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THE BROWNS BOARD

This Week in the AFC North


Zombo

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The Great Zomboni is limping toward the finish line much like the banged up Brownies.

 

Last Week's 1-2-1 (work with me, Tour, I saw a 4-point spread on the Browns game) brings me crawling to the end with a respectable 34-25-1 mark.

 

But it could have been much better, much like the Browns season. For some reason, the Steelers are winning and the Browns are losing and my crystal ball keeps to clouding up.

 

So I ordered a new crystal ball:

 

NFL_Crystal_Ball.jpg

 

Meet the The Crystalli 3000

 

So now I have two crystal balls.

 

And then I hired a new "assistant" to read my balls:

 

sbm-nfl-crystal-ball.jpg?w=640

 

Meet Crystal.

 

After a lengthy session of Crystal examining my balls this is what they ... produced:

 

Cleveland at Baltimore 1 PM

The Browns show up inspired and play tough defense. Connor Shaw plays respectable mistake-free football, but the overmatched Brownies find themselves down 16-10 with the ball on their own 1 yard line with 5 minutes and 2 seconds left. Boom, quick hitter to Gabriel. Boom, quick hitter to Cameron. Boom, draw to Crowell, Boom, Boom, Boom ... next thing you know we are at the Baltimore 5-yard line, 4th down, six seconds left on the clock. Shaw drops back, almost sacked, twists out of it, looks for somebody open, nothing there, scrambles some more, pump fakes and takes off for the corner pylon. Boom, he is flipped up in the air, comes down, swipes the pylon with the ball just before he lands out of bounds, Touchdown Browns! Hartley banks the PAT off the left goalpost and the Ratbirds are home stewing for New Years. BROWNS 17 RAVENS 16

 

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh 8:30 PM Sunday Night Football

Crystal didn't go into much detail on this one. She garbled something about Pittsburgh sucks. But not as well as Crystal. BUNGLES 23 STEELERS 10

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Week 17... Double double week...

Cincinnati Off (+3.5) @ Pittsburgh
Ain't no Steel Curtain no mo'... Looking for a scorefest here.
Rain all day should clear out before this late start.
CIN run game is scary, but LeBeau should figure a way to put the game on Dalton's shoulders.... and if it comes down to Andy vs. Ben...
Prediction: PTG 34 CIN 26

Cleveland (+10.0) @ Baltimore
Two teams limping to the finish with one having dim playoff hopes. It was not too long ago that this looked like a very important season ender. Now it's just Shaw's debut...
More than Shaw's appearance it is Ngata's absence that gives me some hope... just not quite enough.
Prediction: BLT 24 CLE 17

Weekly Results ... Prev ..... This ... YTD
Straight-up ......... 31-28-1 .. TBD ...
Vs. the spread .... 34-26 ..... TBD ...

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Week 17... Double double week...

 

Cincinnati Off (+3.5) @ Pittsburgh

Prediction: PTG 34 CIN 26

Final: PTG 29 CIN 17 - WW/WW

 

Cleveland (+10.0) @ Baltimore

Prediction: BLT 24 CLE 17

Final: BLT 20 CLE 10 - WW/TT

 

Weekly Results ... Prev ..... This ... YTD

Straight-up ......... 31-28-1 .. 4-0 ... 35-28-1

Vs. the spread .... 34-26 .. 2-0-2 ... 36-26-2

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As usual, the Great Zom-choke-on-boner is right off target with his picks. But you know what Zom, you're right about us Steelers fans living in the past. A past where our team always won... kind of like the present.

 

Hey, how about some love for YOUR division champs, the Pittsburgh Steelers?

 

You seem to have an infatuation with penises. I don't think Zombo is that kind of guy. Try the Steeler boards..

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As usual, the Great Zom-choke-on-boner is right off target with his picks. But you know what Zom, you're right about us Steelers fans living in the past. A past where our team always won... kind of like the present.

 

Hey, how about some love for YOUR division champs, the Pittsburgh Steelers?

 

34-27-1

 

The Great Zomboni Once again proves that no one knows the AFC North like TGZ.

 

Great year, the best part is that the Browns own the Steelers for a year, 31-10.

 

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000409347/article/browns-slam-rival-steelers-in-decisive-home-win

 

 

Zombo

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As usual, the Great Zom-choke-on-boner is right off target with his picks. But you know what Zom, you're right about us Steelers fans living in the past. A past where our team always won... kind of like the present.

 

Hey, how about some love for YOUR division champs, the Pittsburgh Steelers?

Douchenozzle, JoeSuxdix......one and the same feckless Steeler fans.

 

These guys are so stupid that they actually act surprised when Zombo picks the Browns to win and the Steelers to lose.

They are also surprised when they see that the sun comes up in the east and sets in the west.

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You do realize I'm merely parodying your own board's policy of changing perfectly innocent handles to homoerotic versions. Or are you that blind?

 

I'd say if anyone's got a thing for peckers it would be the guys who run this place. Don't blame me, son, for what they started.

It is only done because it suits you.....not for any other reason.

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34-27-1

The Great Zomboni Once again proves that no one knows the AFC North like TGZ.

*cough**cough* ... but could be true as your picks are not adding up to 64. Me thinks you did not properly count double-double Week 17...

 

Weekly Results ... Prev ..... This ... YTD

Straight-up ......... 31-28-1 .. 4-0 ... 35-28-1

Vs. the spread .... 34-26 .. 2-0-2 ... 36-26-2

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Gee and here I thought the Steelers and Browns played TWO games against each other this season.

 

So the new definition of "owning" is achieving an even split? Well, guess I should expect the lower standards here.

 

 

 

The standard is getting your ass whopped the LAST time the team's met.

 

But if you want to include the first game, then you were actually outscored 58-13 over 6 quarters.

 

The Browns were clearly the better team head-to-head this year, it's not really up for debate.

 

Zombo

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Oh, you are right, 34-29-1. But still The Greatest.

 

Who the hell knows where you get your spreads from.

Greatest? More entertaining write-ups for sure... most weeks.

 

 

And DH got my spread right... Smart Balance... love the products and the stock, Boulder Brands.

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