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Ebola...I'm fairly certain I'm fucked.


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When I was a child, my favorite book was The Hot Zone. I started becoming obsessed with viruses, even going so far as visiting and interviewing virologists from the CDC. Well, I outgrew my infatuation with viruses when I discovered pot and alcohol in high school. Stuck to golf instead of trying to be studious. Golf is much easier and smoking and drinking are conducive to good golf.

Anyways, last year, whilst flying home from Los Angeles, some fucktard breathed on me. I started getting sick a few days after Christmas. I was in a coma on the fourth of January, 2014.

Fucking swine flu. Seriously, a bigger pile of bullshit has never existed. The day after some asshat of a doctor told my mom I was brain dead, I woke up and was not brain dead. They loved telling me I'd never be off of dialysis, never walk again, never be able to use a restroom on my own again, that sort of nonsense. I told them the whole time they were a bunch of pussies and I'd be normal in a couple of months.

Well, now it is October, and I just started back at work today. I bought my airplane ticket to Wisconsin for October 23rd for a wedding. All I see now , after purchasing said ticket, is this fucking Ebola nonsense. So, I am giving myself a 42% chance of death by November 1st.

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