kshutchins Posted October 14, 2010 Report Share Posted October 14, 2010 Beanpot's League Zombo vs. Ballantyne Buckeyes looked to be a close one with the edge given to the WildDawgs but Zombo was squealing by the time the weekend action was over. Disappointing play from Maurice Jones-Drew (7) and Steven Jackson (8) gave Z the heeby jeebies so he aimed a successful jinx at the Ballantyne Buckeyes' St. Louis Defense (-3). The Buckeyes retaliated with a counter curse in the nick of time. Eli Manning has been a waste of a fantasy football roster spot the last couple of weeks, scoring a 3 and -1 in respective matchups. This week he suspiciously managed to have a breakout performance and racked 19 points for the Buckeyes who now have him benched. Who's the new QB? Some guy named Ben. Final: Ballantyne Buckeyes 80, Zombo 79. Texas Chainsaw Massaquoi must've downed some good luck elixir or given a heckuva pregame speech. The boys came out with Chainsaws blazing and handed The Usual Suspects their first loss. The Suspects lost: Mark Clayton to a season ending injury, their kicker, John Carney, who was released, and the game. Texas Chainsaw Massaquoi 92, The Usual Suspects 89. As go the Green Bay Packers, so goes Huskymania. Garrett Hartley, the lone non-Packer on 'Mania's team was inactive and it was an off day for Green Bay. High scorer for the Pack was Brandon Jackson with 13. Calfox KosarDawgs didn't get any help from backup QB Sam Bradford (0) but did manage 26 points from Brandon Lloyd and 18 from Philadelphia's Defense. KosarDawgs 82 and Huskymania 44. T's Jelly Donuts faced Monday Night Football with resignation, trailing Dot the I 135-43. "I don't think the dirty Sanchez can pull this one out by himself," T murmured into his Dunkin' Donuts original blend java. In a game which had even Dot the I's kicker scoring 22 points, there was little hope for the Jelly's. Dot the I 135, T's Jelly Donuts 72. Perhaps you have wondered, as I have, where the Green Bay Packers kicker fits into the league since he's not on the Huskymania roster. He is comfortably ensconced on Dot the I's bench. Dot the I takes home both high-score trophies this week for Beans' League. Greenville Mayhem needed a mess of points from Percy Harvin and Adrian Peterson to win against Beanpot and the fellas delivered 30. Mayhem 111, the most unfortunate Beanpot 101. Not only would Beans' 101 points have beaten nearly every other team, Beanpot has the second highest number of points for the season. His team is languishing in the bottom third of the league because Beans also has the highest PA (points against) total in the league. Rumor has it that Beanpot is looking for some of that good luck elixir or something to ease the pain. Peyton Manning's trifling 2 points for Insert Clever Name set the tone for the day. NavDawg neatly bumped off ICN, 62-50. Oreo's League: Kamac19 has to be reeling following the stunning events of week 5. After being projected to score 91 points, Kamac finished with a mind-numbing 42. QB Philip Rivers, who must have eaten his weight in Wheaties, was the only player in double digits. Hammertime registered zero from Pittsburgh's Defense (attending a "welcome back" party for the QB-formerly-known-as-Big-Ben) and kicker Garrett Hartley (inactive) but still managed win #1, 51-42. In the "what were they thinking?" department, it seems an entire sack of hammers made some coaching decisions this week. LeSean McCoy (20) and Brandon Loyd (26) spent the week sipping Muscle Milk Light on The Hammer's bench gaping at cheerleaders while their replacements failed to score significant points. It was a gift to the Bronx Browns who won their first game of the season 79-68. Kentucky BarnBurner lit a fire under RBs Chris Johnson (21) and Michael Bush (17). Choo Choo's Hakeem Nicks (32) showed up to play but Peyton Manning (2), Greg Jennings (3) and Adrian Foster (3) left the goods in the station. BarnBurners win their third in a row 87-85, topping the charts with two other teams. Quarterbacks were the key as dirty hands tried hard to lose. QB Bruce Gradkowski (0) stood in for Brett Favre (17) while RB Ronnie Brown, who spent the bye week vacationing, was on the active roster. Two zeroes in key slots should be enough to open the door to defeat. Ben There Raped That couldn't figure out how to turn the advantage into a win as somehow QB Matt Schaub contributed the deciding -1. dirty hands notches W number 4, 80-79 and holds onto a share of the lead. Steve Smith and Antonio Gates, with 17 points each, teamed up to bring home the Toyota Greatest Fantasy Victor honors for Lambdo's Air Show. LAS rounds out the top spots in Oreo's League by defeating beleaguered Beanpot who limped through a critical bye. Tom Brady and Reggie Bush return this week and Beans is optimisic that the team will be back to winning form. Air Show 92, Beanpot 75. DD's can thank Ray Rice (25) and TO (19) for the points needed to top the cat Oreo 93-90 and earn the Viagra Trophy for high score. The thin margin of victory gives Oreo's Team the nod for Unfortunate Matchup of the Week. Those 90 points would have given O a win over nearly every other opponent. A tough week for kitty O who was spotted licking her wounds. The Heidi Report My Helmet's 2Tight 4-1-0 102, why cant we win 0-5-0 63 why cant we win took another loss this week although it is not from a lack of trying. Helmet's coach is not going to say anything against their opponent because they are in the exact same boat in another league so they held a quiet celebration for breaking the century mark in points for the first time. Top scorers: Percy Harvin 23, Phillip Rivers 16 why cant we win: Drew Brees and Reggie Wayne both with 11 Brownies 2-3-0 86, ImisstheKosarDays 2-3-0 133 ImisstheKosarDays snagged the win away from the Brownies in a big way to get his second win of the season and even up the record between the 2 of them. There was only a 1 point difference in the projected scores to begin with but apparently ImisstheKosarDays had some great plays he wasn't telling. Great job. Top scorers: Brownies: Nick Folk 19, Vernon Davis 17 ImisstheKosarDays : Miles Austin and Matt Forte both with 26 RunninUover 1-4-0 69, lets go browns 3-2-0 87 It was a reversal of fortune this week for lets go browns since the projected outcome had RunninUover to win. So lets go, goes home with a Win his pocket and a smile on his face. Top scorers: RunninUover: Roddy White 17, Cedric Benson 14 lets go browns: Chris Johnson 21, Eli Manning 19 Ballantyne Bruisers 3-2-0 99, stewartcj1 3-2-0 65 Wins and losses are now even for these 2 teams. Ballantyne got the win this week with the help of Hakeem Nicks who had 110 receiving yards. Stewartcj1's loss came with the help (or lack thereof) from his QB Matt Schaub who Schaub posted his lowest quarterback rating of the year. Top scorers: Ballantyne Bruisers: Hakeem Nicks 32, Brandon Lloyd 26 stewartcj1: Michael Crabtree 22, Terrell Owens 19 fatherof3 2-3-0 54, Cleveland Steamers 5-0-0 58 Even though this was the lowest scoring game this week, a win is still a win and that means Cleveland Steamers has a perfect in the league so far. Someone from the other bench was heard to shout "You should be ashamed at taking a win away from a fatherof3". But Cleveland Steamers couldn't hear them over the thumping sound coming from patting himself on the back. Top scorers: fatherof3: Payton Hillis 12, Willis McGahee and Nate Kaeding both with 10 Cleveland Steamers: Tony Romo 20, Andre Johnson 11 Nw220 3-2-0 100, Tecmo Bo 2-3-0 48 The last but certainly not least game on the list is the Greatest Fantasy Victor game of the week with a difference of + 52 pts in favor of Nw220. Nw220 performed above what was expected and Tecmo performed below what was expected by almost 1/2 of his projected 84. Sorry about that. Top scorers: Nw220: Malcolm Floyd 28, Robbie Gould 14 Tecmo Bo: Michael Bush 17, Adam Vinatieri 15 Standings: 1. Cleveland Steamers 5-0-0 2. My Helmet's 2Tight 4-1-0 3. Ballantyne Bruisers 3-2-0 4. Nw220 3-2-0 5. lets go browns 3-2-0 6. stewartcj1 3-2-0 7. ImisstheKosarDays 2-3-0 8. Brownies 2-3-0 9. fatherof3 2-3-0 10. Tecmo Bo 2-3-0 11. RunninUover 1-4-0 12. why cant we win 0-5-0 The Great Zomboni In League IV, the Big Bad Dawgs continued to dominate, this time they sunk their teeth into the TXChainsawMassaquois 99-75 to stay in sole possesion of first place with a 4-0-1 mark. Josh Scobee and Kyle Orton led the Dawgs this week, who seem to have a different set of stars each week. Mr Freeze's Snowmen got back in the winning column and remained a half-game out of first by pounding Zombo's Mild Dawgs 102-54, earning the Viagra High Scorer of the week honors behind the spectacular efforts of their receivers Miles Austin and Hakeem Nicks. After the game, we realized it is a rebuilding year at 0-4-1, so we signed Colt McCoy to take over the starting quarterback position and renamed the team "Zombo's Real McCoys". Team Inglewood Jack remains on the Dawg's heals at 4-1 also after dismantling Calfox's Kosardawgs 81-54 led by Roddy White's 17 over our Brownies. He ate Calfox's liver with some fava beans and a nice Inglewood chardonnay. Polk High joined the logjam at 4-1, only needing 64 points to easily best Packermania 64-42, despite starting two players on their bye. So much for "you snooze, you lose." My big hope was that my McCoys would get the Husmania the week of the Packer bye, but that's not going to happen. In a battle of 2-2 teams trying to stay close, Bermeck's KY Hicks gave a bath to the Flea Flickers 85-76 behind a surprisingly good performace from the Arizona defense. Title this one "Hicks Stick it to Flicks". And finally, there are the hard-luck Werewolves of Linden, who fell to 0-5 by losing another close game, this time 77-73 to Jumping Jack Flash. The wolves have outscored four teams in the league but have failed to win a game due to their defense givivng up a league-high 528 points. It seems that everbody gets up to play Linden, the Flash wer able to do it despite not noticing that Brandon Marshall was on his bye. 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