ATENEARS Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Tracking down my online haters By Jeff Pearlman, Special to CNNJanuary 21, 2011 12:29 p.m. EST Editor's note: Jeff Pearlman is a columnist for SI.com. He blogs at jeffpearlman.com. (CNN) -- Matthew is a college student from a small suburban town in Missouri. He loves the Kansas City Chiefs and spending Sundays in front of the TV watching football. Recently, in response to something I wrote on my blog about Jeff Bagwell and the Baseball Hall of Fame, Matt tweeted me a couple of times. The words were snarky and snide and rude. His final message, however, left an extra special impression: "I got caught up in the anonymity of the internet. I'm sorry and here is a legit post with my criticisms." Upon opening the pasted link, I was greeted by a nasty pornographic image that would make Sasha Grey vomit into the nearest trash can. When I later noted to Matt, via Twitter, that my 7-year-old daughter happened to be next to me when I clicked on the picture, he wrote: "lmao. You're so full of ----." Normally, this sort of thing doesn't phase me. Write sports for a living (especially online, as I do for SI.com), insults come with the turf. You're dumb. You suck. You're an idiot. You're a moron. I'll never read your crap again. That's the %#$$ #$@@#$ %$$# thing I've ever heard. How do you have a job? Go to hell. Screw yourself. Drop dead. I've heard them all, and aside from occasionally entertaining my wife with a reading from my Greatest Hits Packet ("I call it my 'Go back to Africa' folder," says Howard Bryant, an African-American ESPN.com senior writer), I turn the other cheek and move on. But not this time. This time, I aspired to know why Matt, cloaked in the anonymity provided by the internet, felt the need to respond in such a way to, of all things, a Jeff Bagwell post. So, going deep, deep, deep undercover, I tracked him down and, shortly after our exchange, gave him a call. Quite frankly, I wanted to hate him. I wanted to bash him. I wanted to plaster his name, address and personal information atop a column on CNN.com, so that when someone Googled his name for future employment, they'd find the words "Sent me a link to pornographic material." Then we spoke. And I (dammit) liked him. Without invisibility or the support of his 54 Twitter followers or the superhuman powers supplied by a warm keyboard, Matt was meek and apologetic. "I was just trying to get a rise out of you," he said. "You're a known sports writer, and I thought it was cool. That's all. I never meant for it to reach this point." Sadly, Matt's online behavior is far from an anomaly. Anyone who writes or is written about is now a potential target for abuse. Online civility -- it if ever existed -- has withered up and died. And it's only getting worse. And online civility toward journalists? Well, 15 years ago, when I began my career at Sports Illustrated, everyone within the magazine's office would receive a thick packet of that week's letters to the editors. Some of the correspondence was positive, some negative. But few letters included words like "stupid," "dumb" or "asinine." Certainly no one, to my recollection, ever directed my attention to hard-core porn. Now, with most online publications allowing readers to comment beneath stories, and with Twitter boasting an estimated 175 million users, and with a phony e-mail address a mere click away, readers can easily lash out. The filter that was a pen and paper has vanished, replaced by the immediate gratification of negativity. The concern for a writer's feelings? Ha. What feelings? "It's about consequences, and not suffering from any," says Jacqueline Whitmore, an etiquette expert and founder of etiquetteexpert.com. "There are absolutely no repercussions to writing a nasty comment or e-mail, so people feel they can vent at will. They never think that the person receiving the message might be a real human being." That's why, when journalists take the time to respond personally to venomous notes, proving that they are made of flesh and blood, the reaction is strikingly -- and puzzlingly -- positive. "I don't know how many times I've tracked down someone who's sent a vile or nasty e-mail, tweet or Facebook post," says Richard Sandomir, the New York Times' sports media columnist. "It often results in their being so astonished, even honored, that you'd find them, that they act normally." Bryant says, "I reply all the time by saying, 'Thank you for writing, I appreciate your opinion though I don't know why you needed to insult me.' The general response is 'Gee, I didn't think anyone was paying attention.' And they want to be pals with you. It's the kick-the-dog syndrome. People believe no one's listening; they think we're not people, they think there are these giant monoliths controlling thought. Then when they realize someone is listening, they rediscover their manners." Indeed, along with contacting Matt, I also tracked down Andy, a 23-year-old aspiring writer who tweeted of me: "jeff Pearlman and billy madison share an intelligence quotient (because jeff Pearlman is a f---ing Retard)." When I dialed a number I found for Andy, his mother answered. (I admit, this brought me great delight.) Andy was even more apologetic than Matt -- and more willing to explain his actions. "A lot of people out here are fed up with sports writing because we feel like all people in your business do is write things to rile us up," says Andy, a New Jersey native who blogs regularly about the Mets. "We feel like there's a lack of integrity." Uh ... so you call me a f---ing Retard? "You know what's funny?" Andy says. "I enjoy your writing. But I disagreed with you [about Bagwell] and I got caught up in the moment. When you read something you think is bull----, you're gonna respond passionately. Was I appropriate? No. Am I proud? Not even a little. It's embarrassing. But the internet got the best of me." Andy pauses. It's an awkward few seconds. He is not happy I called, and later pleads, "Please don't eviscerate me." But, to his credit, he takes responsibility, and says this is something he needs to work on. "All I can say is, I'm sorry," he says. "I'm truly sorry." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATENEARS Posted January 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 This is why I never call anyone a moron, homo, or stupid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewEraDawg Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Nice post . Keeps us more down to earth . Well.......Those of us that cares that is . Well done http://thebrownsboard.com/forums/index.php...mp;#entry225717 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calfoxwc Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 You won't like the guy who posted this, then... @@ ******************************************* "You are a freaking Yippee Homo. This off-season, I couldn't be further turned-off by ... sports. Each time I receive propaganda in my email box about the Browns I want to reply 'Quit sending me this bullshit until you win something!'. I am so tired of being stroked by paper messages directed at season ticket holders. Just xxxxing Win dumb-asses. I have had it. If the Steelers even make it to the Super Bowl this season I might have a postal melt-down. Dick Jauron, Mike Holmgren, Heckert, McCoy, Hillis, Mack, Rubin, Haden, Ward and anyone else associated with this team can kiss my ass. These guys are nothing until they produce in this big cry baby league. The #6 overall draft pick we select can kiss my ass too." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewEraDawg Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Now can I ask who keeps deleting my posts ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calfoxwc Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 NewEraDawg, I see your post above, but it's blank... there aren't any words.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewEraDawg Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 I thought the gestapo went bye bye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WRREBEL Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Sports writers are such fags. They write what ever they want to get a re action. I wish this homo would show up at my door Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
admin Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Now can I ask who keeps deleting my posts ? I checked the Admin & Moderator logs and it shows no moderation this hour. Perhaps when you edited your posts to add the link you erased it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djdawg2010 Posted January 21, 2011 Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 You won't like the guy who posted this, then... @@ ******************************************* "You are a freaking Yippee Homo. This off-season, I couldn't be further turned-off by ... sports. Each time I receive propaganda in my email box about the Browns I want to reply 'Quit sending me this bullshit until you win something!'. I am so tired of being stroked by paper messages directed at season ticket holders. Just xxxxing Win dumb-asses. I have had it. If the Steelers even make it to the Super Bowl this season I might have a postal melt-down. Dick Jauron, Mike Holmgren, Heckert, McCoy, Hillis, Mack, Rubin, Haden, Ward and anyone else associated with this team can kiss my ass. These guys are nothing until they produce in this big cry baby league. The #6 overall draft pick we select can kiss my ass too." I feel ya cal... If the Steelers get to the Super Bowl, my wife and I have already decided we aren't going to bother to watch! I have no rooting interest in that team whatsoever other than to watch them lose. So with that, I'm saving myself the aggrevation! It will be a movie marathon that day. I understand why you're turned off. The Browns who showed such promise went into a tail spin down the stretch, only to see us "rebuild" once again! The Cavs went down the shitter! And the freakin' Indians will continue to be the farm team for other teams, because the Dolans won't spend the money to get legitimate free agents. I'm sick of the losing, and being told to be patient. We've been patient enough! QUIT THE BULLSHIT EXCUSES AND FIND A WAY TO GET THE APPROPRIATE PLAYERS AND PERSONNEL HERE! I know come the draft, and training camp I'll be excited as usual, but right now this just flat out sucks! And no I'm not jumping off of the bandwagon by any means. Just frustrated with the current situation with the Cleveland sports scene. But, because I'm a fan, I'll come back for more. The question is, will other fans do so? If this team gets off to a slow start again next season, are we going to resort to black outs like we almost had in 2009? Remember it took businesses and tv stations to buy up the remaining tickets. Not to mention we needed to extend the deadline to do so. I can't imagine in this economy that businesses, and tv stations are going to buy up the remaining tickets this time around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosar_For_President Posted January 22, 2011 Report Share Posted January 22, 2011 This is why I never call anyone a moron, homo, or stupid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaak Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 This is why I never call anyone a moron, homo, or stupid. Who are you and what did you do with Stan? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaak Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 What kind of sissy, metrosexual, pansy ass people get pissed off at words on a message board? Typically the same people who don't have to boost their own flagging self-esteem by posting nasty comments on a message board. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaak Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 But honestly, WTF? When did men lose their schwantz and grow xxxxs? Words on a message board or blog offensive? Good grief. anyone complaining about that should be castrated. What happened to general human decency? Did that go out the window with anonymity? Do you generally walk up to people you hear talking in a restaurant that you don't agree with and call them douchebags or whatever? Is it because you generally can't see or feel the reaction, except in emotionless text, that you think that to be a "man" you have to ignore insults on a message board? What about being a man, and following the golden rule? Or at the very least, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything? Being a man has nothing to do with not allowing something to upset you. But acting like an adult instead of a sophomoric prick is being a man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djdawg2010 Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 that would be the best thing to happen to this team. if the cleveland fans were able to drop merchandise sales by 60% or more and have at least 1/2 the home games blacked out i think you would see INSTANT change within your organization. most owners can give two shits about what their fans think...............unless, it hurts their wallet. My question is and without the "it will never happen bullshit" that generally comes out of the mouth of Steelers fans... if the roles were reversed, would Steelers fans do the same? I think that Browns fans are shell shocked because of the move, and are afraid if they stop buying tickets, stop buying merchandise, and actually hit Lerner in the wallet then he'll just say f*** it and move the team again! Not saying that is the case, but that could be a part of it. A former coworker of mine a few years back said that the reason that the Browns aren't improving is because they don't need to. The asses are still being put in the seats, and he mentioned that Browns games are an excuse to tailgate, get drunk, and party! In a way that make sense what he is saying. When the game kicks off there are still a lot of empty seats. You don't see that in other stadiums. I mean, I'm not going to lie, I drank when I went to the games but tailgating was not the first priority. Watching the game was. With that, when a group of us had season tickets we had one couple that would go down to the food court at halftime, you know... to smoke, piss, eat, buy beer ect... they would disappear, and wouldn't come back until well into the 4th qtr. It was like, what the hell is the point? I think Browns fans do NEED to make more noise and do something to get the front offices attention to either shit or get off the pot! If you go to a restaurant that continues to provide shitty service, will you continue to patronize that same restaurant!? But on the same token, I just don't want what happened on November 6, 1995 to happen again! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomaspro Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 The sad part is posters like that is why I no longer post on cleveland.com forum. Apparently Advance.net thinks it is ok to employ Mod trolls. I had been posting over there for over 5 years and stopped due to trolls. And the mods condone and actually emphasize trolling. Ask cddbrowns who posts on here. He left for pretty much the same reasons. Just the sad state of the internet and people who do not have a real life or common sense. So that forums loss, is this forums gain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longhorn Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 I must have grown up in a different world than some of you. In my first hour of recess in the 1st grade I heard more threats, foul language and politically incorrect sayings than I have ever read on this board. PS--After I beat the crap out of all the other first graders who pist me off, it stopped. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomaspro Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 Longhorn, I would agree with you. But we are talking about these internet tough guys who have a case of keyboard courage. Are you going to fly out to AZ and beat someone up for what they said to you on the internet? Much different than meeting someone on the play ground. At least on the playground you can beat the tar out of them. Not so much on the internet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longhorn Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 Longhorn, I would agree with you. But we are talking about these internet tough guys who have a case of keyboard courage. Are you going to fly out to AZ and beat someone up for what they said to you on the internet? Much different than meeting someone on the play ground. At least on the playground you can beat the tar out of them. Not so much on the internet. No, because I realize the internet isn't the real world. My "friends" don't live on Facebook, if I want to talk to someone I call them up, and if I allow someone to REALLY get me pissed via some electronic format I deserve it. If someone reads this board regularly, surely they know about 70% of what is said here is in jest or to provoke a sprited response from the other side. If someone takes everything said on this board seriously, they need to contact a virtual shrink to get some virtual therapy so they can overcome their virtual disease. Now I have to run. I need to go water my crops in Farmville or my family will starve from lack of food. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miktoxic Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 What kind of sissy, metrosexual, pansy ass people get pissed off at words on a message board? Just don't read the damn thing. totally agree. same argument has been made for years and years with crap radio (howard stern for example) and tv. just turn the channel or like you said, don't read it. and those don't don't like it, don't post and say so. What happened to general human decency? Did that go out the window with anonymity? Do you generally walk up to people you hear talking in a restaurant that you don't agree with and call them douchebags or whatever? Is it because you generally can't see or feel the reaction, except in emotionless text, that you think that to be a "man" you have to ignore insults on a message board? What about being a man, and following the golden rule? Or at the very least, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything? Being a man has nothing to do with not allowing something to upset you. But acting like an adult instead of a sophomoric prick is being a man. i think people (me included, of course) wouldn't say half the shit they do if they were sitting across the table (or in my case, bar) from someone face to face. it is all about anonymity. yes this is a browns forum and with me as probably most of the people that post here, my blood bleeds brown and orange. we all have points and counterpoints, "we should do it this way" or "we should do it that way". yes it can and does go over the top to the point of boiling over but that doesn't mean that one doesn't respect the other for their views. you can still be an adult but flip out, correct? certain buttons are pushed, someone digs their claw into that one meaty area of your head and it just makes you scream (figuratively). i could say you (not you exactly) are not a man because you didn't choose to serve your country, instead you wanted to march for peace. who is right? you can't question one's manhood because they choose to voice their opinions in ways that you don't agree with. note: patrick henry. (alright, i know). and as far as message boards etc. people are going to continue to post shit because it stirs reaction. i could choose to hit the ignore option so i don't have to see my discontents' posts. but it's like a car wreck, you really don't want to see it........but you kinda do. (love ya wreebs and hlliz twins!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miktoxic Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 No, because I realize the internet isn't the real world. My "friends" don't live on Facebook, if I want to talk to someone I call them up, and if I allow someone to REALLY get me pissed via some electronic format I deserve it. If someone reads this board regularly, surely they know about 70% of what is said here is in jest or to provoke a sprited response from the other side. If someone takes everything said on this board seriously, they need to contact a virtual shrink to get some virtual therapy so they can overcome their virtual disease. Now I have to run. I need to go water my crops in Farmville or my family will starve from lack of food. awesome. you are correct sir! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djdawg2010 Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 honestly, and it's hard for someone who hasn't gone through what cleveland went through with it's team to know how they'd react for sure, but i'd like to think that this is what i would do. would i do it after 1yr? no. after 3yrs? no. after 10yrs and no hope in sight? yeah, i'd probably do it. i like to come on this board and give you guys hell, but it's all in good fun. i was devastated too when i heard our biggest rivals would be moving to baltimore as a different team. i thought it was garbage, and i know and respect the fans of the browns enough to know that in no way was this something they wanted. i don't know exactly where the line is but at some point fans DO have the resposibility (if they are true fans) to not let ownership worry about making bucks and not winning championships. i don't know how much you can push your ownership before they'd be willing to just get rid of the team, but i don't think the NFL will let a franchise leave cleveland like it did before. all i can say is i hope things turn around for your franchise. HERE'S TO THE BROWNS BEING THE STEELERS TOP COMPETITION IN OUR DIVISION (not the ravens) FROM NOW ON!!!!!!!!! Nice, respectful and well thought out post. Thank you. I remember when Steelers fans were wearing the orange ribbons in support for the Cleveland fans. It was very cool. I'm not going to go out and say that there is no hope, but I will say that we were just starting to put it together and then more changes were made again! So with that, now I EXPECT steady improvement! If it's going to take 2-3 years until we get to sniff contention, fine! But I want to see progress with each season. None of this 5-11 BS. Ws should increase and Ls should decrease! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miktoxic Posted January 25, 2011 Report Share Posted January 25, 2011 you sport a Vajooorna in your pants. vajoorna: as in fur burger? hair pie? the slippery susan? seriously though. i think a forum is a place for people to post what they want. a lot of people disagree with each other and fight to the bitter end about topics. some just come on to stir the shit pot. some come on and try to invoke a laugh. i can bitch at someone cuz they don't agree with my point of view, and it might ensue in a couple of personal tit for tat shit, but aren't we all browns' fans in the end? (yes even you trolls) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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