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The Cat in the Hat ate Green Eggs and Ham

The Gipper

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If you’re wary: Please take a seat, it isn’t that scary.

"A Quarterback in the third round? Almost all of them have drowned."

I hear your words and do not discredit, but trust me this Kessler can thread it. He started as a high recruit, A+ character to boot. He had four coaches in college, so he’s got a-lot of pro-style knowledge. But these are all just anecdotals-

"Show me some of the numbers with sums and totals!"

Completions at 68%, that’ll leave any coach content. 88 touchdowns and only 19 interceptions? What is it that skewed their perceptions? An almost perfect QB rating. "What’s not to like?" is what I’m stating. He took a team coached by a drunk, spun it around and got them out of their funk.

"He can’t throw it deep! At least that’s how Kiper talks… What’s keeping the opponent from loading up the box?"

His last coach at USC says he can make all of the throws. But will that translate? Nobody knows. QBOTF we may call him. Didn’t you read Krupka’s Wisconsin tape column? Who would you rather the Browns took? That Michigan State douche Conner Cook?

"Well he’s not Jared Goff or Jameis Winston. I would’ve rathered another DeValve from Princeton."

I can see your thought. DeValve’s one that has my glare caught. Those splits look insane, how did we all not know his name? You’ve gotten me off topic. Now let me use some of my rhyming logic. Brock Osweiller commands 75 mill. Fitzpatrick wants ten a year. If the Browns sign a Q-B, they’re going to have to charge more than ten for a Great Lakes beer. Kessler is cheap. And if he doesn’t pan out, they’ll just throw him on the heap. A game-manager is what most have him labeled. A game-manger can win a Super Bowl! Look at the team around him they’ve started to build! Schobert, DeValve, Ogbah and Corey Coleman. Caldwell, Nassib, Scooby and Shon Coleman!

"All of those names on that window jersey just make me cry. Who was another third-rounder? Jesus Christ… Charlie Frye."

Ya, I know. The Browns have sucked. But the new Browns, a better team they’re beginning to construct. They’ve trimmed the fat with their new roster. Competition it will foster. Forget that window jersey, The front offices before were just doing guesswork. It’s only kept alive by ESPN and the NFL Network.

"I’ve come to fruition on my position. You don’t have to be statistician for a suspicion on why you love the Browns new QB addition."

Sashi, Paul and Hue have a vision and it is my position that with ambition they are the best tactician to choose the Browns new QB addition. In remission, I give to submission.


By CoyG Biv on May 12, 2016,

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I do not like them on the field.

I do not like them in our house

I do not like them here or there

I do not like them anywhere

I would not could not in the rain

Or on a bus or on a plane

I do not like them Hue I am.

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Wow that was pretty clever, Gipper on top of his game more than ever.


Nevertheless completely unnecessary, like an asshole all stinky and hairy.

I didn't not create this. I only copied and pasted. CoyG Biv wrote it.....I didn't fail to attribute it.

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