kshutchins Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Good Evening Sports Fans! Tomorrow is soup day where I work so I've been spending time in the kitchen. My apologies for the tardiness of this report. I'm the laggard of the bunch. Heidi was an eager beaver this week and had her reports in early in the week. Flugel was also prompt and thorough as usual. Thanks guys! Beanpot's League One: Jumpin' Jack Flash garnered sole possession of first place by clobbering Flug's Cardiac Kids, 112-79. Flug's put their best players on the field and superior coaching brought an impressive 21 point performance from Beanie Wells. JJFlash was not to be denied and Chris Johnson (35) and Tom Brady (23) put them well over the top. DTBH was the top performer in League One thanks to Brandon Marshall (25), LaDainian Thomlinson (18), Frank Gore (17) and San Francisco's Defense (17). Their opponent, Peyton's Zombies (formerly The Mighty Quinnbos aka Derek and the Zombonos) are clearly a team struggling for an identity. Brady Quinn didn't take a single snap for his namesake team before he was traded (along with Adrian Peterson and Greg Olsen) to Huskymania for Peyton Manning, Kevin Faulk and Jeremy Shockey at mid-week. Alex Smith (0) was the QB of record for week 10 and likely has played his last down for the Zombies who seem to have given up on the coach. Final: DTBH 115; Zombies 58. NavDawg's Browns finally put one in the win column, defeating Insert Clever Name, 101-66. The win by NavDawg was not sufficient to move the team out of last place, but it did prevent ICN from sharing the top spot with Jumpin' Jack Flash. Baltimore's Defense scored 24 for NavDawg thanks to the Cleveland Browns' inept offense. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (20) also helped in the victory. The coach of ICN has some explainin' to do because Bobby Wade and Cedric Benson scored 0 and 00 respectively while Donnie Avery (20), Kellen Winslow (13) and Pierre Garcon (12) rode the pine. Greenville Mayhem, a model of fantasy football inadequacy and ineptitude (in other words, they suck eggs), dodged a bullet this week. The controversial play by Maurice Jones-Drew which had him downing the ball on the one yard line rather than scoring 6, had Beanpot frustrated and Mayhem grateful. The kicking of Steven Hauschka spared Beanpot a loss, but saw the kicker thumbing a ride out of B'more after Sunday's debacle. The result: Mayhem 75; Beanpot 75. The Usual Suspects caught a bye week break. Their opponent, Calfox KosarDawgs, summed it up nicely, "Buckhalter gets me -2 pts, and Cassel gets me zero pts? We just caught a royal buttkickin." Always the good sport, Calfox concluded, "ROF,LMAO! Good job..." Suspects win 74-44. Also played: alwAysLOsing 91; Huskymania 74. Huskymania is hoping the recent trade with Peytons ZomQuinnbies will lift his team out of the middle of the pack. T's Jelly Donuts 78; Ballantyne Buckeyes 67 Beanpot's League Two Full 'o Beans When it last happened, we rubbed our eyes and thought to ourselves, "I must be seeing things!" Once we found out it was true, we didn't believe it would ever happen again. Bo and the Boz basked in the glory of snagging both the Viagra Award and the Toyota Biggest Fantasy Blowout honors rightfully claiming, "Bo knows fantasy." This incredible feat occured when Bo and the Boz amassed 171 fantasy points in a single weekend, defeating his opponent by an astonishing 110 points. Here it is, just a few weeks later. Can you believe it? Another 171 fantasy performance is on the books; This time it's from Bo's opponent in the earlier record game. That's right, dirty hands recored 171 fantasy points, knocking off Beanpot 171-80. Though Beans' team gave a good effort, the outcome was clear before the contest was over. Beanpot, who maintained good humor despite the loss, exhibited gentlemanly optimism. "Hmm. Looks like Mason is going to have to play fairly well tonight for me to have a chance. That plus the Browns putting up 35+ points gives me a real shot at this thing!" he bantered. Outstanding play from Chris Johnson (35), Reggie Wayne (30), and Peyton Manning (26) were top performers for the winning team. Dirty hands, who had hoped in vain to beat the 171 point record, remains one notch behind Bo and the Boz in both the league and the record books. Though the team matched the high score for the season, the margin of victory for dirty hands was "only" 91 points. Congratulations on an outstanding week, hands! Here's your virtual trophy: Lambdo's Air Show has taken off on a three game winning streak, making a late season run at the top of the standings. With the juggernaut of Bo and dirty hands at the top, he's got his work cut out for him. This week the Air Show demonstrated their superiority over ground transportation by overtaking the Choo Choo's 114-72. Randy Moss (32) gave an airshow of his own, catching 9 passes for 179 yard to seal the deal for Lambdo. Justin Hermouf bounced back into the win column, taking out the Flying Turkeys, 96-54. The Turkeys, who need to perform better if they're to avoid being the centerpiece on a Thanksgiving table, opened the door for the Hermouf victory. A goosegg from Alex Smith, a paltry 3 from Chad Ochocinco, and 2 from Mike Wallace grounded the birds. Sidney Rice (20) was high scorer for Hermouf. "Good job," gobbled the Turkeys. Bo and the Boz, who appeared oblivious that his scoring record had been challenged, was dealing with other challenges. Jerome Harrison took the #2 running back spot but failed to score while Kevin Smith sat out the game. By the end of the day Tuesday, Harrison was on the street and Smith was activated for week 11. Also acquired and activated for week 11, is Cleveland's defense. Let's hope Bo knows what he's doing. The Boz won over Bermeck's KY Hicks-* 92-65. The Hicks' top scorer was Kellen Winslow (13). hammertime dealt a painful blow to Oreo's Team, squeaking past the kitty 68-62. A -4 points from Jay Cutler and a paltry 5 from Hines Ward helped Oreo shoot herself in the paw. Donnie Avery (20), Beanie Wells (21), and David Garrard (14) sat the game out for Oreo. TJ Howdoyouspellmyname (20) helped hammertime inch closer to the top of the standings. Finally, The Hammer secured last place, losing to the Double D's 71-50. The Heidi Report: My Helmet's 2Tight 64 One Man Wolf Pac 63 Ballantyne Behemoths 84 Brown'sFanInDallas 68 Doctors of Gridiron 71 Timugen's Tool 67 WPBDawgFan 64 LCDawgfan13 72 Brownies 87 BOHICA 88 WV Hoopies 35 FBrulz 97 My Helmet's 2 Tight 6-4-0: Joseph Addai 17, Kellen Winslow 13 One Man Wolf Pac 2-8-0: Philip Rivers 16, Tony Gonzalez 10 Helmet won this match up by the skin of their teeth. They'll also have to do without WR Dwayne Bowe because he's been suspended four games for violating the league's performance enhancing drugs policy. Ouch! One Man Wolf Pac's QB missed on five of his 25 passes, collecting 231 yards and two scores. Ballantyne Behemoths 8-2-0:Tom Brady 23, Maurice Jones-Drew 17 Brown'sFanInDallas 3-7-0: Chris Johnson 35, Brett Farve 12 Behemoths came out on top of this one but it was Brown'sFanInDallas that had the player with the highest points between the two of them. Chris Johnson had 35 points with is fantastic for any player. Johnson ran for 132 yards and two touchdowns, and he caught nine passes for 100 more. Great effort by both teams. Doctors of Gridiron 7-3-0: Steven Jackson 26, Ray Rice 15 Timugen's Tool 4-6-0: Frank Gore 17, Aaron Rodgers 16 While Doctors won this one it's a good thing he didn't have to count on his QB. Roethlisberger was off all day Sunday, going 20 for 40 for 174 yards. RB Steven Jackson picked up the slack with 131 yards and a touchdown on 26 carries. Timugen's Tool's QB Aaron Rodgers completed 25 of 36 passes for 189 yards and a touchdown. WPBDawgFan 4-6-0: Brandon Marshall 25, Jamaal Charles 16 LCDawgfan13 6-4-0: Sidney Rice 20, Adrian Peterson 18 LCDawgfan13 won this week's game. He'll need to look elsewhere for a Kicker next week though because his (Steven Hauschka) is N/A. WPBDawgFan, while a decent team had a handicap this week at QB, Cleveland's own Brady Quinn who got him a -3 points. If he decides to keep Quinn, I honestly hope he does better for him in the future. Brownies 4-6-0: Matte Forte 18, Wes Welker 15 BOHICA 6-4-0: Payton Manning 26, LaDainian Tomlinson 18 Both teams gave it their all in this one point difference match up. Brownies lost but it sure wasn't because of their Baltimore Defense who came through with 24 points. BOHICA'S QB Peyton Manning completed 28-of-44 passes for 327 yards and four touchdowns. He also threw two interceptions and was sacked once.These games with only 1 point difference seem, at least to me, harder than a blowout. If only one player had that extra bowl of Wheaties before the game, it could come out different. WV Hoopies 2-8-0: Michael Turner & Neil Rackers both w/7 FBrulz 8-2-0: Randy Moss 32, Kurt Warner 18 In this week's Toyota Biggest Fantasy Blowout, it is again this league's first place team (by 4 points) FBrulz that comes out the big winner with a + 62 points. He didn't break 100 points but it sure was enough to win. His WR Randy Moss had nine catches for 179 yards and two touchdowns. This is one tough team. Great job FBrulz! But keep an eye open behind you, Behemoths is right there breathing down your neck. Standings: 1. FBrulz 8-2-0 .800 919 W-2 2. Ballantyne Behemoths 8-2-0 .800 915 W-3 3. Doctors of Gridiron 7-3-0 .700 862 W-3 4. My Helmet's 2Tight 6-4-0 .600 842 W-2 5. BOHICA 6-4-0 .600 801 W-2 6. LCDawgfan13 6-4-0 .600 759 W-1 7. Timugen's Tool 4-6-0 .400 849 L-3 8. WPBDawgFan 4-6-0 .400 782 L-2 9. Brownies 4-6-0 .400 763 L-2 10. Brown'sFanInDallas 3-7-0 .300 616 L-2 11. WV Hoopies 2-8-0 .200 663 L-5 12. One Man Wolf Pac 2-8-0 .200 659 L-1 Inside Flugel’s League 3 – Week 10 Rice’s Ryders 48 Flugelmaniacs 48 This game blended 2 schools of thought. First: “when you don’t score - you don’t win.” Neither team won. Second: “when your opponent can’t score – you can’t lose.” Neither team lost. Can you think of a better game for insomniacs to watch? Believe it or not, there was one on television Monday Night so things can always be worse. Let’s translate the outcome of this game for League 3 Society: Rice’s Ryders are now 4-4-2 while Flugel’s Follies took a half-step out of the basement at 2-7-1. Believeland 121 Calfox KosarDawgs 88 This was an exciting high scoring match-up as the final score reveals. Believeland was led by Reggie Wayne’s 30 points, Reggie Bush’s 20 and Adrian Peterson’s 18. The KosarDawgs countered with Peyton Manning’s 26 points and 17 points apiece from Frank Gore and Jeremy Maclin. Believeland improved to 7-1-2 and sole possession of 2nd place. Calfox told reporters that his team is 4-6 with playoffs in the forecast. When asked what advice Calfox would give his next opponent - Calfox replied: “Give your soul to God because your ass belongs to me!” They’re facing a pretty fired up Rice’s Ryders so keep an eye out for that match-up folks. Project Showtime 107 Dot the I 51 Project Showtime continued to show sports fan everywhere why they are in first place. They improved to 8-1 thanks in large to the 35 point scoring clinic provided by Chris Johnson. Speaking of Showtime, Bud Adams was spotted showing opponents how he punctuates scoring with redneck sign language the politically correct refer to as “the double birdies.” Aside from that, Jerricho Cotchery added 16 points while Ray Rice and Wes Welker chipped in 15 points apiece. Dot the I might want to start changing focus to kill the guy with the ball or light thy scoreboard. Their record dropped to 4-5-1, which isn’t quite as bad as hearing Ronnie Brown was lost for the remainder of the season and Brian Westbrook’s length of disability remains in question as well. Runn Uu Over 72 Waiting for Noodles 57 Runn Uu Over received 24 points from the Ravens Defense as it stifled Cleveland’s “Nevermore” Offense. Steve Smith contributed another 18 points to make the winning difference over Waiting for Noodles. Runn Uu Over is now 5-5 and just a half a game out of the 4th and final playoff spot. Speaking of the team currently holding that 4th spot, the Noodles got 16 points from Aaron Rodgers and another 12 points from former Buckeye Santonio Holmes as they fell to 5-4-1. Charlie’s Angels 91 Team DangeRuss 90 When 1 team is wearing a picture of Charles Manson’s mug shot on their helmet and the other is called DangeRuss – they’re going to bring you more entertainment value than the Longest Yard. Tom Brady led Charlie’s Angels the same way Tom Bosley always did. He scored with them during and after work. His 23 points was followed up by LT’s 18 points and Anquan Boldin’s 15 points. They are now 4-6 while DangeRuss fell to 4-6 in spite of a great 26 point performance by Steven Jackson. TJ Houshmandzedah also added 20 points. Victory Formation 106 Kibbles & Vicks 96 32 points from Randy Moss combined with 19 points from Donovan McNabb and 17 more from Larry Fitzgerald was enough to put 1 team in the Victory Formation for a 6-3-1 record. Unfortunately, that wasn’t good news for the Kibbles & Vicks team that scored an impressive 96 points from the sum of Brandon Marshall’s 25 + Lee Evans’ 19 + Jones-Drew’s 17. This one played out like the fantasy football version of Old Yeller – great story with a crappy ending. You have to admire the refusal to quit in Kibbles & Vicks. They seem like they know tough times don’t last – tough people do. The Fabulous 5 Power Rankings: 1. Project Showtime 8-1-0 1025 pts 2. Believeland 7-1-2 923 pts 3. Victory Formation 6-3-1 953 pts 4. Waiting for Noodles 5-4-1 857 pts 5. Runn Uu Over 5-5-0 787 pts Is it possible? Can the Lions have a worse day on the gridiron than the Browns? ::fingers crossed:: Go Brownies! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
why cant we win Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 i apprectaite the love coming from you lol <-------- kibbles and vicks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calfoxwc Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 I want to thank you characters for the great fun write-ups. ...I look forward to reading them every week, like I look forward to maybe winning a freakin game every week. "sigh" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirty Hands Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 i really thought i had a chance to overcome the 171 mark with a last second hail mary interception if quinn could keep the ball inbounds i might have had a chance. thanks for the write ups i love them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CIMO. Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 I hoped some of my fantasy's team magic would rub off on Harrison...maybe a carry or two would've helped his stats? Oh well. At least I have a cupcake on my schedule this week. I'm just here to do the Beanpot trot. *clap* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zombo Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 I hoped some of my fantasy's team magic would rub off on Harrison...maybe a carry or two would've helped his stats? Oh well. At least I have a cupcake on my schedule this week. I'm just here to do the Beanpot trot. *clap* Oh ... My ... God. Zombo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beanpot Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 I hoped some of my fantasy's team magic would rub off on Harrison...maybe a carry or two would've helped his stats? Oh well. At least I have a cupcake on my schedule this week. I'm just here to do the Beanpot trot. *clap* Holy crap, I got an email about this thing just the other day. That's all kinds of awkward awesomeness! "Flash" is Scott Gordon - current head coach of the Isles. He no doubt is *thrilled* that this sucker saw the light of day, especially after BU beat 'em. Much like I'll feel after you beat me this weekend, CIMO, my good buddy. Beanpot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicopee John Posted November 20, 2009 Report Share Posted November 20, 2009 Something I'd expect from a bunch of BC pussies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowsrus Posted November 21, 2009 Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 That's quite okay Kathy! It's soup weather and you got it in before the new week started and you got your soup done! Great job! Now I have an urge to have soup. And yes, I was rather eager this week. I sat down at the computer Monday night, got things ready, went to league 4 and as I was about to start I realized it WAS Monday night and there were games going on!! Heidi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kshutchins Posted November 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 21, 2009 I hoped some of my fantasy's team magic would rub off on Harrison...maybe a carry or two would've helped his stats? Oh well. At least I have a cupcake on my schedule this week. I'm just here to do the Beanpot trot. *clap* That's hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beanpot Posted November 22, 2009 Report Share Posted November 22, 2009 As awful as that was, there's an even more awful version of awfulness out there: Beanpot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowsrus Posted November 23, 2009 Report Share Posted November 23, 2009 As awful as that was, there's an even more awful version of awfulness out there: Beanpot I've seen this one before. It's hilarious and embarrassing all at the same time. Too funny! Heidi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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